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Entry tags:
Butterfly Effect: Chapter 41
Authors: Bard Linn and Kiraya
Genre: General/Drama
Pairings: ZackxSeph, OCxOC, Assorted Past
Rating (Overall): PG-13
Warnings: None this chapter.
Summary: Cloud probably mentioned it.
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy VII and all associated characters and symbols are the exclusive property of Square Enix and its associates. We’re just borrowing them for a while.
Chapter 41
The thing about Zack is when he gets upset, you need to keep him busy. The problem, though, is unless he’s interested in something, he’ll never put all of his energy into it. Usually it takes some combination of people and military stuff to keep his attention.
—Cloud’s journal, 6 April 472
“Hey. How many more papers do you have? Because I’m starved and the mess hall’s mystery meat looks even worse than usual.” Zack took the seat down in front of his superior in an undignified flop.
“Only your report on the new formations of squads,” came the reply.
“Well then, stash it for tomorrow and I’ll give you a summary over dinner. My treat.” He smiled. “Since you paid last time.”
“I’d prefer to hear it directly from you, anyway. Your reports can be… interesting to decipher.”
“Well, there’s quite a bit of whining and groaning going on, but they’re starting to shape up.” Zack’s expression was sadistically gleeful. “I actually managed to get Matheson to find me some Ying-Yangs.”
Sephiroth raised a silver brow. “I was under the impression that they were relatively rare.”
“Apparently they found a set of eggs in the ruins of the lab at Nibelheim.” Zack grinned. “Needless to say, one encounter helped bring home the fact that they would be more effective in groups.” SOLDIERS tended to work alone rather than together. The ability to work in a group was a necessary qualification to achieve entry, but like so many things, it often was influenced by the enhancement process. Even in groups they nearly always ended up working independently of each other unless a commander with sufficient force of personality kept them following the tactics he’d dictated. The higher up in rank, the more this tended to be true. Coyle and Moser were very much an exception to the norm, as Zack and Cloud had been, which was part of the reason Zack made such a good officer — and Cloud had been placed on the officer track. Even Sephiroth himself wasn’t immune. He had rarely worked well with anyone until Zack, who had worked hard to accustom himself to his superior officer. It had been rough for a while, but now the pair had an unmatchable synchronization.
Taking heed of Cloud’s written observations, deciphered a few weeks ago, Sephiroth had given Zack the task of creating other such permanent pairs and, where possible, trios. They also wanted to balance out weaknesses in the groups — again, Coyle and Moser were a good pair here, covering physical and magical combat respectively. Sephiroth couldn’t think of anyone better suited to the job than Zack — the dark-haired SOLDIER knew more of his comrades personally than any other officer. He had excellent insight into people’s personalities, and with the help of a small panel of SOLDIERs was now focusing on evaluating SOLDIERs’ abilities as completely as they had in their entrance exams.
Realistically, Sephiroth realized this would be a difficult, lengthy project. Not all the teams would work out, and Zack would have to keep reshuffling. Not all of them would have even half of the close relationships their extant successful partnerships had, but if they could get just that much, SOLDIER would be a much more effective fighting force. He would probably have to create a new position to handle the job, either giving it to someone else or training a new aide.
Had Cloud been alive, Sephiroth knew what he would do without a doubt. Even Zack would admit Cloud could take over for him easily.
“And so that’s about it — I think Carlson is making up a list of SOLDIERs who need to practice with their materia. He’s not too impressed by some of them. I know we all have our strengths, but some of them can’t hit a target if it’s a meter wide.”
Sephiroth nodded. “Anything else?”
“Only that I need to put in a personal day for next week — Arthur’s wedding’s coming up,” Zack said, taking a right, leading them towards Havoc’s.
“Ah, that’s right.” Sephiroth briefly wondered if he should clear his schedule as well. He didn’t know Dennett, nor was the specialist under his command — he hadn’t even gone to the few weddings of SOLDIERs he knew — but he felt the odd urge to attend.
Zack gave him a knowing look. “I’ll be Cloud’s representative. You’d be bored out of your mind and intimidate everyone in sight. Stay late and get some extra work done, or hit the gym.”
“Perhaps I should go just to hear your speech.”
“My speech…” Zack grimaced. “Ugh. I still don’t know what I’m going to say. I guess that’ll have to wait until inspiration strikes.”
Sephiroth hid a smile.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
There’s a lot more to Arthur than I first realized. He’s really smart — just not in the combatant way. I wonder if I could encourage him to get into a different branch of the service. He doesn’t fit as a grunt.
—Cloud’s journal, 17 October 469
Zack watched the crowd sweep into the reception hall, taking a sip of his water to soothe his suddenly dry throat. The wedding had gone wonderfully, and at a surprisingly low budget for Midgar — especially considering the bride was the daughter one of the executives of ShinRa. No elaborate hall for this wedding; it had been held outside in one of the older MMG Project parks. Aeris had worked particularly hard on the area once the couple had chosen it, and the results had been extraordinary, even for her vast talents. It had gone particularly well with the bride’s dress — green, the traditional color for weddings, symbolizing fertility (not very subtle, come to think of it) — and Arthur hadn’t looked too bad in his suit either. Zack caught Aeris’s eye as she moved to her seat at one of the side tables, and they shared a quick, sad smile. Things were still somewhat awkward between them, but they both were sharing the same thought at that moment — if only Cloud were here.
Someone cleared his throat, and that was when Zack realized that everyone had settled in and it was not time for him to speak. He rose to his feet. “Um, hi. Most of you know who I am—” a few laughs “—but for those who don’t, I’m Zack Sinclair.” He swallowed. “Most of you also know that I’m not the one who was supposed to be up here talking right now, but… the situation being what it is, I’m going to do my best to do what Arthur’s real best man would’ve done.” The newlyweds exchanged a sad smile of their own at that.
“Arthur’s a great guy. He’s smart and really personable. Whenever I’ve been with him he’s always thinking about the future and what he can do for others. He and Morgan make a hell of a pair — I’ve seen them talk SOLDIERs twice their weight and half again their height into taking their meds. It’s been an amazing experience to watch them grow together, and I hope I get to continue to see them build their lives. And maybe play with the kids.” Zack paused for the laughter that followed his wry tone then raised his glass in toast. “To Arthur and Morgan — may they have many wonderful years together.” He sipped, then plopped down back into his seat, relieved that ordeal was over. Cloud would’ve done a hell of a better job, but he didn’t think he’d done all that bad, really.
He felt kinda cheated, though — shouldn’t he have been able to open his mouth and the words just come pouring out as Cloud spoke from the beyond? That’s how it would have happened in a movie — though unfortunately for him, his life still refused to follow one of those cheesy feel-good romantic comedy scripts. Too bad; he could’ve used a “happily ever after” in under two hours.
Zack let his thoughts wander for a while as the rest of the bridal party continued on with the traditional speeches and dedications and gifts. Finally, dinner was served, and he checked another item off his mental list. Another hour or so — a bit after the dancing was well under way he should be able to slip out. Normally he was one for any sort of party, but he just didn’t have the energy for it tonight. He felt… mortally tired. Heartsick, he decided, watching Arthur and Morgan lead off the dancing. For the first time in over a month, Cloud’s absence was like a knife in his gut, felt as keenly as it had been when he’d first heard the news. Zack could’ve teased him about his lack of dancing skills, shoved him at the pretty ladies (and maybe the occasional good-looking guy), even seen him dressed up in his SOLDIER formal uniform… always a treat, if he might say so himself. Just ‘cause he was with Seph didn’t mean he couldn’t still appreciate the sights, and Cloud had never been hard on the eyes, even on a bad day.
“Zack?” His eyes snapped up to meet Aeris’s, watching him in concern. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Just thinking.”
“That’s unusual for you,” Aeris teased, and Zack relaxed a little at that. Things had been so awkward before he hadn’t been sure she’d ever act normal around him again — it was nice to hear a lighter tone from her. “Aren’t you going to dance?”
“Uh…” Speaking of awkward, this had the potential to become extremely weird.
“Just once? For old times’ sake?”
“…All right. Just one dance.” He pushed his chair out of the way and led her onto the dance floor.
They had never danced too much while they were dating. Aeris had always been very careful about where they went together, trying to hide her whereabouts from ShinRa. Still, they moved together across the floor with a fluidity that spoke of long familiarity. Again Zack could see all that might have been — a happy family, perhaps living above the Plate, maybe living outside Kalm… he’d still be in SOLDIER, of course, but they’d have a few kids at home — at least one girl, maybe two boys, who’d of course want to follow their dad into the service. Aeris would be beautiful pregnant, one of those glowing mothers who made everyone stop and smile. They’d grow old together, and he’d retire to spend his days in the sunshine.
But now Zack could see with abrupt clarity all those things he hadn’t wanted to think about before. His ties to ShinRa were far too strong for him to walk away from the company any time soon. If they’d gotten married, Aeris would have been alone far too often, and when she was pregnant she would’ve had to fend for herself or rely on her mother and friends. He still would’ve had long trips away from Midgar; there would’ve been months they wouldn’t have seen each other at all. And Gaea forbid a war had ever broken out again; communications in wartime were carefully monitored and very nearly rationed, so there would’ve been long periods where he couldn’t even call to talk to her.
Most sinister of all to consider was the possible fate of the children they might’ve had. Zack didn’t know why Hojo had wanted Aeris; if she ever wanted to tell him, she would, but until she did, he wasn’t going to ask — years of working for ShinRa instilled a sense of knowing when to keep your mouth shut, at least in everyone who lasted that long. But if whatever he’d wanted was genetic… crossing that with a SOLDIER’s enhancements would be very tempting. If it became too tempting—
Zack could see it now. He’d be on a long, high-profile mission that’d keep him pretty much completely out of contact. A few weeks into it a mysterious “accident” would happen; if he was lucky, their children would only be injured and need ShinRa’s medical services, picking up a few interesting enhancements along the way. If he wasn’t, he would never see Aeris or their children again.
“Mind if I cut in?”
Zack snapped out of his reverie to see Reeve Tuesti standing there. Nodding, he stepped back and allowed the other man to whirl Aeris across the floor, moving to the side of the room to watch them.
Maybe… maybe Aeris was better off with Reeve — at least now. Too much had changed for them to go back to what they had been, but Zack thought he’d like to at least be Aeris’s friend again. He had missed her for much more than their romantic relationship. She had a unique way of looking at the world that really helped him put things into perspective sometimes.
The young woman laughed and begged off another dance, leaving the ballroom to journey down the hall for a moment. Zack’s eyes followed her, and he noted the other multitude of women moving in and out of the hallway. Must be the bathroom.
“You watch her very carefully.”
Zack turned his attention back to Reeve, who was watching him. His expression was neutral, but the SOLDIER knew a probe to test the waters when he heard one. “She’s a good friend,” he finally said. “And, well… she has enemies.”
“Don’t we all, in Midgar?” Reeve observed philosophically. “You weren’t always ‘just friends,’ though…”
“No, but… I think we’re pretty over that, now.” Zack shook his head. “Things have changed too much between us. I can’t be there for her as much as I’d like. You will, though, won’t you?” Just a touch of threat there — Aeris could be a tremendous bargaining chip in the corporate world of ShinRa, and Zack was taking no chances.
A nod. “Absolutely. She’s a vital part of the MMG Project — I’m sure we wouldn’t have done nearly as well without her.”
Zack had to wonder if Reeve really thought he was fooling him. He knew full well the other man’s interest wasn’t merely professional — or even platonic. Though why he’d be okay for a potential partner while I’m not…
He shook his head, dispelling the bitter thought. Things were over between him and Aeris; there was no use dwelling on it. “Well, as long as she’s all right, that’s all that matters,” he finally replied. Glanced around, Zack noted that the crowd seemed involved enough to let him slip away. “Just take good care of her.”
“I will,” Reeve replied solemnly, and Zack believed him. He was a good guy, he knew from keeping an ear out, the type who treated peers and subordinates alike with kindness. The SOLDIER was content with that. Without another word, he left the party to return to base. He might as well ditch his fancy clothes and head to the gym — Seph was locked up in meetings until at least midnight.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Vincent is a lot more like Sephiroth than I think he wants to admit. He’s very comfortable belonging to an organization with a series of set tasks and a protocol to follow. Sometimes I wonder why he (Vincent, I mean) doesn’t just go back to the Turks, but then I remember what happened to him while he was there and I don’t wonder anymore. Maybe someday, but it’s going to take a while for those wounds to heal enough that he can trust anyone, much less a group that exists to stab people in the back.
—Cloud’s journal, 9 March 470
“You wished to speak to me?”
Tseng forced himself not to jump. He was good, very good at what he did, but Valentine was better. Some of it, he knew, had nothing to do with human capability, though, so he was determined not to allow himself feel incompetent. “I have heard that you are training the Lockhart girl.”
“It is something Cloud started.”
Tseng resisted the urge to shake his head. Valentine was terribly entwined with that boy, far more than a sane man should be… but then again, he wasn’t sure his predecessor’s former partner was sane. The things he’d been through… Tseng hadn’t seen all of Hojo’s files, but they had recovered enough to paint a grim picture.
Well. If continuing Cloud’s work kept the man reasonably grounded, so be it.
“We have an opening for a trainer,” he said casually, watching the other man as he went still, clearly thinking. “You could be reinstated as a Turk, or you could work as a consultant for an hourly wage.” Tseng was well aware that Valentine enjoyed extremely flexible hours these days and used that to do whatever he felt like, whenever the whim took him. If they were to take him back into the fold, they would need to do so slowly, one step at a time. A man of Valentine’s talents was a shame to throw away, and that was exactly what would happen if someone didn’t coax him to take back up his old life.
“…Would I be teaching tactics, stealth, or combat?”
“Primarily stealth, though I’d like to draft a new course on how to deal with enhanced individuals.” SOLDIERs might have higher security clearance than civilian employees, but that didn’t mean they didn’t occasionally find out things that they shouldn’t know — things the company could not permit to be known. Of course, elimination of these particular individuals was tricky for most Turks, and it was incredibly difficult to get a SOLDIER to eliminate another SOLDIER unless they were clearly guilty of something reprehensible.
“It would be an interesting exercise.”
An understatement, to be sure. Most interestingly, though, Valentine didn’t seem to have any problems helping to create a program that could be used against him. Tseng wondered about that briefly — but then again, Valentine knew better than most how expendable a Turk could be. His pragmatic view of the possibility of his own death was hardly unsurprising. “Very well,” he murmured. “I’ll make up your passcard. I’ll see you in my office at six tomorrow?”
Valentine gave a sharp nod, then vanished into the shadows. Tseng felt himself relax a bit, for the time being. It would certainly be interesting trying to keep Valentine dancing to his tune… though at least the challenge would keep their association lively.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It’s kind of funny. Zack acts as a pretty good grounder to Sephiroth, keeping him physically well — eating enough, getting sleep, that sort of thing — but he also keeps him on track emotionally. It’s not a bad system. Sephiroth keeps Zack in line and makes sure he gets his work done, but I have noticed that he isn’t very good at helping Zack deal with his emotional needs. I hate to think what might happen if Zack ever really needed Sephiroth’s support but he couldn’t give it.
—Cloud’s journal, 23 May 472
Everyone in SOLDIER was tense.
In fact, “running scared” wouldn’t be too far off the mark for some of the newer members. The older, more experienced ones would go about things almost as normal, but avoided General Sephiroth’s office. Usually there was a fairly steady stream of traffic in and out, dropping off reports, picking up orders, requests for training missions and materia… the list was endless. But for the past week, all unnecessary business had been put off. No one wanted to be in there, not when both Zack and Sephiroth were on edge. Normally Zack was good at defusing Sephiroth’s sour moods, but lately they only magnified those feelings in each other, building them even stronger as they swung between rage and utter depression.
There was no question of ‘why’ either; Coyle and Moser had given an answer to that soon enough. The first anniversary of Cloud’s death was quickly approaching.
Sephiroth dealt with his emotions the way he usually did — by throwing himself into his work and ignoring them. Zack would try to do the same for a few hours before disappearing below the Plate, coming back with monster blood soaked into his clothing. The anniversary itself went no differently — save that when Sephiroth finally returned to the quarters he and Zack shared almost nightly now, the lights were already out.
“Zack?” he called, eyes sweeping the room. He put the bag of food he carried — sent up by Ms. Gainsborough with the strict instructions to make Zack eat or else — on the chair by the couch.
“Don’t put that there!”
Sephiroth didn’t jump. It would take far more than a voice coming from his feet to make him startled, though he did look down at Zack in surprise. Why was he curled up next to the chair as if it was his best friend? And reeking of alcohol, no less, which explained a lot. “Zack, what are you doing?”
“Don’t put that there. That’s Cloud’s chair!”
Sephiroth glanced again at the piece of furniture in question. He could indeed remember how often Cloud had sat there when he had come by simply to spend time with them. Somewhere along the way it had become his chair; in fact, he remembered Zack and Cloud starting mock fights over the chair more than once, with Cloud wining each time and Zack retreating with exaggerated reluctance to the couch to sit with Sephiroth. Sometimes Valentine had sat in on another chair, but often it had only been the three of them. And without fail, Cloud had always taken the chair.
Realistically speaking, it was mostly likely Cloud hadn’t wanted to be in close quarters with his superior officers, though he probably would have been comfortable with Zack on the couch. Then again… the chair didn’t have as much room for movement as the couch. Cloud, with a number of smaller weapons on him, would have had an easier time escaping its confines if needed, plus it would give Sephiroth a better view of the door — even if the probability of being attacked in his quarters was so low it might as well have been zero. Still, Cloud had probably picked up on the fact that Sephiroth hated having a door or window at his back, and would seat himself so that his superior officer would have all the advantages in place of an attack. He’d been observant like that.
“Zack…” Sephiroth felt rather lost, not quite sure how to handle things. His friend was so obviously distressed and clearly needed someone to reach out to… but dealing with emotions had never been his forte. Usually he just let Zack deal with it himself. “…Ms. Gainsborough sent some dinner…”
“‘M not hungry.”
“I realize that, but you need to eat.” He grabbed Zack’s arm and lifted him from his seat on the floor, then got him onto the couch. He gathered up the bag that Zack was still glaring at and made a mental note to do something about that chair. It was standard issue, so he couldn’t just throw it out — ShinRa got upset when you disposed of something of theirs, especially for no better reason than “our dead best friend used to sit in this chair all the time” — but it couldn’t stay where it was. Maybe he could put it in the closet…
Starting to reheat the food, he watched Zack from the safety of the shadows of the kitchen. He didn’t know what the man had been drinking — though considering his status he wouldn’t be surprised if it was that blasted moonshine. He was clearly out of it, eyes glazed over, face unnaturally flushed, even shaking a little.
Sephiroth felt a rising sense of irritation, for some reason he couldn’t explain. Do I have to do everything myself? He set the silverware he held down firmly, and then his vision grayed out.
The next thing he knew he was sitting on the couch, holding Zack, who was crying into his shoulder. There. Much better.
Sephiroth’s heart raced, and it wasn’t because of Zack’s closeness. He didn’t remember moving from the kitchen to the living room, nor reaching out to his friend. What in the world had happened?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Everyone underestimates Aeris and Tifa because they’re girls. It’s funny — Tifa’s not built in anyway that would make you think she was weak. I mean, her muscles aren’t exactly small or hidden. But most guys look at her long hair and her chest and think “easy target.” Aeris is a bit different — she isn’t as fast as Tifa, or as strong, but her potential with materia knows no bounds, as far as I can tell. I wish we could get our hands on some of those legendary rare materia — I’d love to see her throw comets at some of the SOLDIERs who refuse to believe women can be good fighters.
—Cloud’s journal, 12 December 471
“We were a bit surprised not to see you last night,” Aeris said as Zack entered the Church.
“Yeah — sorry. Had stuff to do.” There was no way that he was going to admit that he had gotten smashed and cried his eyes out on Sephiroth’s shoulder. First of all, it did not do to allow your ex-girlfriend to know you had gotten that drunk. Zack had higher standards than that. Second of all, it wouldn’t do Sephiroth’s reputation any good. Frankly, it had surprised Zack that Seph had reached out to him like that — though he could admit it that he’d needed it desperately. A shoulder to cry on had made him feel a thousand times better about the entire thing.
Not that the chair in question hadn’t mysteriously vanished by the time he had woken up this morning. That hadn’t really surprised Zack any more than the fact that he had three days of mandatory medical leave based upon his superior officer’s analysis of his mental state. Zack had been more than a little tempted to call pot-kettle at that, but had refrained, instead quietly acquiescing. He was tired, and he knew Sephiroth wouldn’t stop from pulling in the specialists, if he refused to cooperate.
Zack wouldn’t be above giving as good as he’d gotten a little later, though…
“We held vigil without you,” Tifa said, rather coldly.
Zack simply nodded, ignoring her tone. “I’m sorry. I’ll be there next year, long as I’m in Midgar. Promise.” He glanced around. “Have you been practicing?”
“We haven’t been able to focus much lately. I’ve been doing more gardening,” Aeris admitted.
“Well, get your stuff out. I’ll help you,” Zack offered. It’d be easier than conversation, and more helpful. “You know what missing a day does to you.”
Aeris laughed. “You sound more like Cloud than yourself, there,” she teased. “Aren’t you more for taking time off and relaxing?”
“Your muscles will know the difference,” Zack replied, tapping her lightly with the practice staff she handed him. He might not be as well versed in staff techniques as Cloud had been, but every SOLDIER learned the basics, and he could practice those with them as well as anyone else. His speed and agility would make up for the difference.
He worked with them for more than two hours, and by the time he was done they were both dripping with sweat, looking winded. Zack was a bit out of breath himself, but pleased. Cloud had done a great job the girls, better than he’d realized. It made him feel better about Aeris wandering around the city on her own, and Tifa going about her work at the bar.
The SOLDIER absentmindedly wondered how long Tifa would last before ShinRa contracted her for some organization or another. She was getting good, and ShinRa always preferred to snap up such talented people for themselves. She also seemed to have been practicing lately more than Aeris, and with more direction. Zack had to wonder who was working with her… it didn’t seem like it’d be Cloud’s friends Scott or Paul. Could it have been Valentine? It seemed uncharacteristic of the man, but Tifa’s style was definitely taking on more of the shifty underhand moves Zack had seen in Cloud’s every once and a while. The blond had used them only rarely, but when backed into a corner (literally or otherwise)… well, he had far more tricks up his sleeve than one might’ve expected.
Zack thought about warning Tifa not to demonstrate that side of her style too openly… but decided against it. He wouldn’t want to infringe on Vincent’s territory; the man would take care of it himself. He’d done fantastically with Cloud, after all, and from what Zack heard his new Turk students were shaping up wonderfully.
Of course, Turk trainees had to shape up, unless they wanted to take a permanent vacation.
“We haven’t been working as hard as we should’ve.” Aeris said, slightly breathless. “You’re right; I noticed the difference.” She gave him a searching look that made Zack shiver a bit. It looked almost like she was looking through him, but not at him. “Thanks for your help. I didn’t think I’d mentioned the thing with the blind spot on my right side.”
The SOLDIER shook his head. “Oh, that? Cloud probably mentioned it. Look, it’s almost lunchtime, and I intend to drag Seph out long enough to eat with the sun. I’ll catch you two later.”
He walked swiftly away, still unnerved by Aeris’ green-eyed gaze, which he felt burning into his back. Every once in a while that girl just didn’t seem human.
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Genre: General/Drama
Pairings: ZackxSeph, OCxOC, Assorted Past
Rating (Overall): PG-13
Warnings: None this chapter.
Summary: Cloud probably mentioned it.
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy VII and all associated characters and symbols are the exclusive property of Square Enix and its associates. We’re just borrowing them for a while.
Chapter 41
The thing about Zack is when he gets upset, you need to keep him busy. The problem, though, is unless he’s interested in something, he’ll never put all of his energy into it. Usually it takes some combination of people and military stuff to keep his attention.
—Cloud’s journal, 6 April 472
“Hey. How many more papers do you have? Because I’m starved and the mess hall’s mystery meat looks even worse than usual.” Zack took the seat down in front of his superior in an undignified flop.
“Only your report on the new formations of squads,” came the reply.
“Well then, stash it for tomorrow and I’ll give you a summary over dinner. My treat.” He smiled. “Since you paid last time.”
“I’d prefer to hear it directly from you, anyway. Your reports can be… interesting to decipher.”
“Well, there’s quite a bit of whining and groaning going on, but they’re starting to shape up.” Zack’s expression was sadistically gleeful. “I actually managed to get Matheson to find me some Ying-Yangs.”
Sephiroth raised a silver brow. “I was under the impression that they were relatively rare.”
“Apparently they found a set of eggs in the ruins of the lab at Nibelheim.” Zack grinned. “Needless to say, one encounter helped bring home the fact that they would be more effective in groups.” SOLDIERS tended to work alone rather than together. The ability to work in a group was a necessary qualification to achieve entry, but like so many things, it often was influenced by the enhancement process. Even in groups they nearly always ended up working independently of each other unless a commander with sufficient force of personality kept them following the tactics he’d dictated. The higher up in rank, the more this tended to be true. Coyle and Moser were very much an exception to the norm, as Zack and Cloud had been, which was part of the reason Zack made such a good officer — and Cloud had been placed on the officer track. Even Sephiroth himself wasn’t immune. He had rarely worked well with anyone until Zack, who had worked hard to accustom himself to his superior officer. It had been rough for a while, but now the pair had an unmatchable synchronization.
Taking heed of Cloud’s written observations, deciphered a few weeks ago, Sephiroth had given Zack the task of creating other such permanent pairs and, where possible, trios. They also wanted to balance out weaknesses in the groups — again, Coyle and Moser were a good pair here, covering physical and magical combat respectively. Sephiroth couldn’t think of anyone better suited to the job than Zack — the dark-haired SOLDIER knew more of his comrades personally than any other officer. He had excellent insight into people’s personalities, and with the help of a small panel of SOLDIERs was now focusing on evaluating SOLDIERs’ abilities as completely as they had in their entrance exams.
Realistically, Sephiroth realized this would be a difficult, lengthy project. Not all the teams would work out, and Zack would have to keep reshuffling. Not all of them would have even half of the close relationships their extant successful partnerships had, but if they could get just that much, SOLDIER would be a much more effective fighting force. He would probably have to create a new position to handle the job, either giving it to someone else or training a new aide.
Had Cloud been alive, Sephiroth knew what he would do without a doubt. Even Zack would admit Cloud could take over for him easily.
“And so that’s about it — I think Carlson is making up a list of SOLDIERs who need to practice with their materia. He’s not too impressed by some of them. I know we all have our strengths, but some of them can’t hit a target if it’s a meter wide.”
Sephiroth nodded. “Anything else?”
“Only that I need to put in a personal day for next week — Arthur’s wedding’s coming up,” Zack said, taking a right, leading them towards Havoc’s.
“Ah, that’s right.” Sephiroth briefly wondered if he should clear his schedule as well. He didn’t know Dennett, nor was the specialist under his command — he hadn’t even gone to the few weddings of SOLDIERs he knew — but he felt the odd urge to attend.
Zack gave him a knowing look. “I’ll be Cloud’s representative. You’d be bored out of your mind and intimidate everyone in sight. Stay late and get some extra work done, or hit the gym.”
“Perhaps I should go just to hear your speech.”
“My speech…” Zack grimaced. “Ugh. I still don’t know what I’m going to say. I guess that’ll have to wait until inspiration strikes.”
Sephiroth hid a smile.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
There’s a lot more to Arthur than I first realized. He’s really smart — just not in the combatant way. I wonder if I could encourage him to get into a different branch of the service. He doesn’t fit as a grunt.
—Cloud’s journal, 17 October 469
Zack watched the crowd sweep into the reception hall, taking a sip of his water to soothe his suddenly dry throat. The wedding had gone wonderfully, and at a surprisingly low budget for Midgar — especially considering the bride was the daughter one of the executives of ShinRa. No elaborate hall for this wedding; it had been held outside in one of the older MMG Project parks. Aeris had worked particularly hard on the area once the couple had chosen it, and the results had been extraordinary, even for her vast talents. It had gone particularly well with the bride’s dress — green, the traditional color for weddings, symbolizing fertility (not very subtle, come to think of it) — and Arthur hadn’t looked too bad in his suit either. Zack caught Aeris’s eye as she moved to her seat at one of the side tables, and they shared a quick, sad smile. Things were still somewhat awkward between them, but they both were sharing the same thought at that moment — if only Cloud were here.
Someone cleared his throat, and that was when Zack realized that everyone had settled in and it was not time for him to speak. He rose to his feet. “Um, hi. Most of you know who I am—” a few laughs “—but for those who don’t, I’m Zack Sinclair.” He swallowed. “Most of you also know that I’m not the one who was supposed to be up here talking right now, but… the situation being what it is, I’m going to do my best to do what Arthur’s real best man would’ve done.” The newlyweds exchanged a sad smile of their own at that.
“Arthur’s a great guy. He’s smart and really personable. Whenever I’ve been with him he’s always thinking about the future and what he can do for others. He and Morgan make a hell of a pair — I’ve seen them talk SOLDIERs twice their weight and half again their height into taking their meds. It’s been an amazing experience to watch them grow together, and I hope I get to continue to see them build their lives. And maybe play with the kids.” Zack paused for the laughter that followed his wry tone then raised his glass in toast. “To Arthur and Morgan — may they have many wonderful years together.” He sipped, then plopped down back into his seat, relieved that ordeal was over. Cloud would’ve done a hell of a better job, but he didn’t think he’d done all that bad, really.
He felt kinda cheated, though — shouldn’t he have been able to open his mouth and the words just come pouring out as Cloud spoke from the beyond? That’s how it would have happened in a movie — though unfortunately for him, his life still refused to follow one of those cheesy feel-good romantic comedy scripts. Too bad; he could’ve used a “happily ever after” in under two hours.
Zack let his thoughts wander for a while as the rest of the bridal party continued on with the traditional speeches and dedications and gifts. Finally, dinner was served, and he checked another item off his mental list. Another hour or so — a bit after the dancing was well under way he should be able to slip out. Normally he was one for any sort of party, but he just didn’t have the energy for it tonight. He felt… mortally tired. Heartsick, he decided, watching Arthur and Morgan lead off the dancing. For the first time in over a month, Cloud’s absence was like a knife in his gut, felt as keenly as it had been when he’d first heard the news. Zack could’ve teased him about his lack of dancing skills, shoved him at the pretty ladies (and maybe the occasional good-looking guy), even seen him dressed up in his SOLDIER formal uniform… always a treat, if he might say so himself. Just ‘cause he was with Seph didn’t mean he couldn’t still appreciate the sights, and Cloud had never been hard on the eyes, even on a bad day.
“Zack?” His eyes snapped up to meet Aeris’s, watching him in concern. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Just thinking.”
“That’s unusual for you,” Aeris teased, and Zack relaxed a little at that. Things had been so awkward before he hadn’t been sure she’d ever act normal around him again — it was nice to hear a lighter tone from her. “Aren’t you going to dance?”
“Uh…” Speaking of awkward, this had the potential to become extremely weird.
“Just once? For old times’ sake?”
“…All right. Just one dance.” He pushed his chair out of the way and led her onto the dance floor.
They had never danced too much while they were dating. Aeris had always been very careful about where they went together, trying to hide her whereabouts from ShinRa. Still, they moved together across the floor with a fluidity that spoke of long familiarity. Again Zack could see all that might have been — a happy family, perhaps living above the Plate, maybe living outside Kalm… he’d still be in SOLDIER, of course, but they’d have a few kids at home — at least one girl, maybe two boys, who’d of course want to follow their dad into the service. Aeris would be beautiful pregnant, one of those glowing mothers who made everyone stop and smile. They’d grow old together, and he’d retire to spend his days in the sunshine.
But now Zack could see with abrupt clarity all those things he hadn’t wanted to think about before. His ties to ShinRa were far too strong for him to walk away from the company any time soon. If they’d gotten married, Aeris would have been alone far too often, and when she was pregnant she would’ve had to fend for herself or rely on her mother and friends. He still would’ve had long trips away from Midgar; there would’ve been months they wouldn’t have seen each other at all. And Gaea forbid a war had ever broken out again; communications in wartime were carefully monitored and very nearly rationed, so there would’ve been long periods where he couldn’t even call to talk to her.
Most sinister of all to consider was the possible fate of the children they might’ve had. Zack didn’t know why Hojo had wanted Aeris; if she ever wanted to tell him, she would, but until she did, he wasn’t going to ask — years of working for ShinRa instilled a sense of knowing when to keep your mouth shut, at least in everyone who lasted that long. But if whatever he’d wanted was genetic… crossing that with a SOLDIER’s enhancements would be very tempting. If it became too tempting—
Zack could see it now. He’d be on a long, high-profile mission that’d keep him pretty much completely out of contact. A few weeks into it a mysterious “accident” would happen; if he was lucky, their children would only be injured and need ShinRa’s medical services, picking up a few interesting enhancements along the way. If he wasn’t, he would never see Aeris or their children again.
“Mind if I cut in?”
Zack snapped out of his reverie to see Reeve Tuesti standing there. Nodding, he stepped back and allowed the other man to whirl Aeris across the floor, moving to the side of the room to watch them.
Maybe… maybe Aeris was better off with Reeve — at least now. Too much had changed for them to go back to what they had been, but Zack thought he’d like to at least be Aeris’s friend again. He had missed her for much more than their romantic relationship. She had a unique way of looking at the world that really helped him put things into perspective sometimes.
The young woman laughed and begged off another dance, leaving the ballroom to journey down the hall for a moment. Zack’s eyes followed her, and he noted the other multitude of women moving in and out of the hallway. Must be the bathroom.
“You watch her very carefully.”
Zack turned his attention back to Reeve, who was watching him. His expression was neutral, but the SOLDIER knew a probe to test the waters when he heard one. “She’s a good friend,” he finally said. “And, well… she has enemies.”
“Don’t we all, in Midgar?” Reeve observed philosophically. “You weren’t always ‘just friends,’ though…”
“No, but… I think we’re pretty over that, now.” Zack shook his head. “Things have changed too much between us. I can’t be there for her as much as I’d like. You will, though, won’t you?” Just a touch of threat there — Aeris could be a tremendous bargaining chip in the corporate world of ShinRa, and Zack was taking no chances.
A nod. “Absolutely. She’s a vital part of the MMG Project — I’m sure we wouldn’t have done nearly as well without her.”
Zack had to wonder if Reeve really thought he was fooling him. He knew full well the other man’s interest wasn’t merely professional — or even platonic. Though why he’d be okay for a potential partner while I’m not…
He shook his head, dispelling the bitter thought. Things were over between him and Aeris; there was no use dwelling on it. “Well, as long as she’s all right, that’s all that matters,” he finally replied. Glanced around, Zack noted that the crowd seemed involved enough to let him slip away. “Just take good care of her.”
“I will,” Reeve replied solemnly, and Zack believed him. He was a good guy, he knew from keeping an ear out, the type who treated peers and subordinates alike with kindness. The SOLDIER was content with that. Without another word, he left the party to return to base. He might as well ditch his fancy clothes and head to the gym — Seph was locked up in meetings until at least midnight.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Vincent is a lot more like Sephiroth than I think he wants to admit. He’s very comfortable belonging to an organization with a series of set tasks and a protocol to follow. Sometimes I wonder why he (Vincent, I mean) doesn’t just go back to the Turks, but then I remember what happened to him while he was there and I don’t wonder anymore. Maybe someday, but it’s going to take a while for those wounds to heal enough that he can trust anyone, much less a group that exists to stab people in the back.
—Cloud’s journal, 9 March 470
“You wished to speak to me?”
Tseng forced himself not to jump. He was good, very good at what he did, but Valentine was better. Some of it, he knew, had nothing to do with human capability, though, so he was determined not to allow himself feel incompetent. “I have heard that you are training the Lockhart girl.”
“It is something Cloud started.”
Tseng resisted the urge to shake his head. Valentine was terribly entwined with that boy, far more than a sane man should be… but then again, he wasn’t sure his predecessor’s former partner was sane. The things he’d been through… Tseng hadn’t seen all of Hojo’s files, but they had recovered enough to paint a grim picture.
Well. If continuing Cloud’s work kept the man reasonably grounded, so be it.
“We have an opening for a trainer,” he said casually, watching the other man as he went still, clearly thinking. “You could be reinstated as a Turk, or you could work as a consultant for an hourly wage.” Tseng was well aware that Valentine enjoyed extremely flexible hours these days and used that to do whatever he felt like, whenever the whim took him. If they were to take him back into the fold, they would need to do so slowly, one step at a time. A man of Valentine’s talents was a shame to throw away, and that was exactly what would happen if someone didn’t coax him to take back up his old life.
“…Would I be teaching tactics, stealth, or combat?”
“Primarily stealth, though I’d like to draft a new course on how to deal with enhanced individuals.” SOLDIERs might have higher security clearance than civilian employees, but that didn’t mean they didn’t occasionally find out things that they shouldn’t know — things the company could not permit to be known. Of course, elimination of these particular individuals was tricky for most Turks, and it was incredibly difficult to get a SOLDIER to eliminate another SOLDIER unless they were clearly guilty of something reprehensible.
“It would be an interesting exercise.”
An understatement, to be sure. Most interestingly, though, Valentine didn’t seem to have any problems helping to create a program that could be used against him. Tseng wondered about that briefly — but then again, Valentine knew better than most how expendable a Turk could be. His pragmatic view of the possibility of his own death was hardly unsurprising. “Very well,” he murmured. “I’ll make up your passcard. I’ll see you in my office at six tomorrow?”
Valentine gave a sharp nod, then vanished into the shadows. Tseng felt himself relax a bit, for the time being. It would certainly be interesting trying to keep Valentine dancing to his tune… though at least the challenge would keep their association lively.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It’s kind of funny. Zack acts as a pretty good grounder to Sephiroth, keeping him physically well — eating enough, getting sleep, that sort of thing — but he also keeps him on track emotionally. It’s not a bad system. Sephiroth keeps Zack in line and makes sure he gets his work done, but I have noticed that he isn’t very good at helping Zack deal with his emotional needs. I hate to think what might happen if Zack ever really needed Sephiroth’s support but he couldn’t give it.
—Cloud’s journal, 23 May 472
Everyone in SOLDIER was tense.
In fact, “running scared” wouldn’t be too far off the mark for some of the newer members. The older, more experienced ones would go about things almost as normal, but avoided General Sephiroth’s office. Usually there was a fairly steady stream of traffic in and out, dropping off reports, picking up orders, requests for training missions and materia… the list was endless. But for the past week, all unnecessary business had been put off. No one wanted to be in there, not when both Zack and Sephiroth were on edge. Normally Zack was good at defusing Sephiroth’s sour moods, but lately they only magnified those feelings in each other, building them even stronger as they swung between rage and utter depression.
There was no question of ‘why’ either; Coyle and Moser had given an answer to that soon enough. The first anniversary of Cloud’s death was quickly approaching.
Sephiroth dealt with his emotions the way he usually did — by throwing himself into his work and ignoring them. Zack would try to do the same for a few hours before disappearing below the Plate, coming back with monster blood soaked into his clothing. The anniversary itself went no differently — save that when Sephiroth finally returned to the quarters he and Zack shared almost nightly now, the lights were already out.
“Zack?” he called, eyes sweeping the room. He put the bag of food he carried — sent up by Ms. Gainsborough with the strict instructions to make Zack eat or else — on the chair by the couch.
“Don’t put that there!”
Sephiroth didn’t jump. It would take far more than a voice coming from his feet to make him startled, though he did look down at Zack in surprise. Why was he curled up next to the chair as if it was his best friend? And reeking of alcohol, no less, which explained a lot. “Zack, what are you doing?”
“Don’t put that there. That’s Cloud’s chair!”
Sephiroth glanced again at the piece of furniture in question. He could indeed remember how often Cloud had sat there when he had come by simply to spend time with them. Somewhere along the way it had become his chair; in fact, he remembered Zack and Cloud starting mock fights over the chair more than once, with Cloud wining each time and Zack retreating with exaggerated reluctance to the couch to sit with Sephiroth. Sometimes Valentine had sat in on another chair, but often it had only been the three of them. And without fail, Cloud had always taken the chair.
Realistically speaking, it was mostly likely Cloud hadn’t wanted to be in close quarters with his superior officers, though he probably would have been comfortable with Zack on the couch. Then again… the chair didn’t have as much room for movement as the couch. Cloud, with a number of smaller weapons on him, would have had an easier time escaping its confines if needed, plus it would give Sephiroth a better view of the door — even if the probability of being attacked in his quarters was so low it might as well have been zero. Still, Cloud had probably picked up on the fact that Sephiroth hated having a door or window at his back, and would seat himself so that his superior officer would have all the advantages in place of an attack. He’d been observant like that.
“Zack…” Sephiroth felt rather lost, not quite sure how to handle things. His friend was so obviously distressed and clearly needed someone to reach out to… but dealing with emotions had never been his forte. Usually he just let Zack deal with it himself. “…Ms. Gainsborough sent some dinner…”
“‘M not hungry.”
“I realize that, but you need to eat.” He grabbed Zack’s arm and lifted him from his seat on the floor, then got him onto the couch. He gathered up the bag that Zack was still glaring at and made a mental note to do something about that chair. It was standard issue, so he couldn’t just throw it out — ShinRa got upset when you disposed of something of theirs, especially for no better reason than “our dead best friend used to sit in this chair all the time” — but it couldn’t stay where it was. Maybe he could put it in the closet…
Starting to reheat the food, he watched Zack from the safety of the shadows of the kitchen. He didn’t know what the man had been drinking — though considering his status he wouldn’t be surprised if it was that blasted moonshine. He was clearly out of it, eyes glazed over, face unnaturally flushed, even shaking a little.
Sephiroth felt a rising sense of irritation, for some reason he couldn’t explain. Do I have to do everything myself? He set the silverware he held down firmly, and then his vision grayed out.
The next thing he knew he was sitting on the couch, holding Zack, who was crying into his shoulder. There. Much better.
Sephiroth’s heart raced, and it wasn’t because of Zack’s closeness. He didn’t remember moving from the kitchen to the living room, nor reaching out to his friend. What in the world had happened?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Everyone underestimates Aeris and Tifa because they’re girls. It’s funny — Tifa’s not built in anyway that would make you think she was weak. I mean, her muscles aren’t exactly small or hidden. But most guys look at her long hair and her chest and think “easy target.” Aeris is a bit different — she isn’t as fast as Tifa, or as strong, but her potential with materia knows no bounds, as far as I can tell. I wish we could get our hands on some of those legendary rare materia — I’d love to see her throw comets at some of the SOLDIERs who refuse to believe women can be good fighters.
—Cloud’s journal, 12 December 471
“We were a bit surprised not to see you last night,” Aeris said as Zack entered the Church.
“Yeah — sorry. Had stuff to do.” There was no way that he was going to admit that he had gotten smashed and cried his eyes out on Sephiroth’s shoulder. First of all, it did not do to allow your ex-girlfriend to know you had gotten that drunk. Zack had higher standards than that. Second of all, it wouldn’t do Sephiroth’s reputation any good. Frankly, it had surprised Zack that Seph had reached out to him like that — though he could admit it that he’d needed it desperately. A shoulder to cry on had made him feel a thousand times better about the entire thing.
Not that the chair in question hadn’t mysteriously vanished by the time he had woken up this morning. That hadn’t really surprised Zack any more than the fact that he had three days of mandatory medical leave based upon his superior officer’s analysis of his mental state. Zack had been more than a little tempted to call pot-kettle at that, but had refrained, instead quietly acquiescing. He was tired, and he knew Sephiroth wouldn’t stop from pulling in the specialists, if he refused to cooperate.
Zack wouldn’t be above giving as good as he’d gotten a little later, though…
“We held vigil without you,” Tifa said, rather coldly.
Zack simply nodded, ignoring her tone. “I’m sorry. I’ll be there next year, long as I’m in Midgar. Promise.” He glanced around. “Have you been practicing?”
“We haven’t been able to focus much lately. I’ve been doing more gardening,” Aeris admitted.
“Well, get your stuff out. I’ll help you,” Zack offered. It’d be easier than conversation, and more helpful. “You know what missing a day does to you.”
Aeris laughed. “You sound more like Cloud than yourself, there,” she teased. “Aren’t you more for taking time off and relaxing?”
“Your muscles will know the difference,” Zack replied, tapping her lightly with the practice staff she handed him. He might not be as well versed in staff techniques as Cloud had been, but every SOLDIER learned the basics, and he could practice those with them as well as anyone else. His speed and agility would make up for the difference.
He worked with them for more than two hours, and by the time he was done they were both dripping with sweat, looking winded. Zack was a bit out of breath himself, but pleased. Cloud had done a great job the girls, better than he’d realized. It made him feel better about Aeris wandering around the city on her own, and Tifa going about her work at the bar.
The SOLDIER absentmindedly wondered how long Tifa would last before ShinRa contracted her for some organization or another. She was getting good, and ShinRa always preferred to snap up such talented people for themselves. She also seemed to have been practicing lately more than Aeris, and with more direction. Zack had to wonder who was working with her… it didn’t seem like it’d be Cloud’s friends Scott or Paul. Could it have been Valentine? It seemed uncharacteristic of the man, but Tifa’s style was definitely taking on more of the shifty underhand moves Zack had seen in Cloud’s every once and a while. The blond had used them only rarely, but when backed into a corner (literally or otherwise)… well, he had far more tricks up his sleeve than one might’ve expected.
Zack thought about warning Tifa not to demonstrate that side of her style too openly… but decided against it. He wouldn’t want to infringe on Vincent’s territory; the man would take care of it himself. He’d done fantastically with Cloud, after all, and from what Zack heard his new Turk students were shaping up wonderfully.
Of course, Turk trainees had to shape up, unless they wanted to take a permanent vacation.
“We haven’t been working as hard as we should’ve.” Aeris said, slightly breathless. “You’re right; I noticed the difference.” She gave him a searching look that made Zack shiver a bit. It looked almost like she was looking through him, but not at him. “Thanks for your help. I didn’t think I’d mentioned the thing with the blind spot on my right side.”
The SOLDIER shook his head. “Oh, that? Cloud probably mentioned it. Look, it’s almost lunchtime, and I intend to drag Seph out long enough to eat with the sun. I’ll catch you two later.”
He walked swiftly away, still unnerved by Aeris’ green-eyed gaze, which he felt burning into his back. Every once in a while that girl just didn’t seem human.
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